George Burns quotes

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

At my age flowers scare me.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.

At my age flowers scare me.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.