George Burns quotes

You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

At my age flowers scare me.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

At my age flowers scare me.

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.