Louis C K quotes

I don't stop eating when I'm full. The meal isn't over when I'm full. It's over when I hate myself.

Cars and cameras are the two things I let myself be materialistic about. I don't care about other stuff.

I don't like comedy. I like funny things. I don't like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, 'Oh Jesus.'

I've met a lot of people who've lost their jobs and they still have a sense of humor.

When I read things like the foundations of capitalism are shattering, I'm like, maybe we need that. Maybe we need some time where we're walking around with a donkey with pots clanging on the sides.

I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work.

When I take my kids out for dinner or lunch, people smile at us.

I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work.

The problem is, the more famous you get, the more people see you who didn't choose to.

I've learned from experience that if you work harder at it, and apply more energy and time to it, and more consistency, you get a better result. It comes from the work.

If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it.

A lot of the struggle I had with movies is I really loved moments and tones and feelings in a scene, and I loved creating those, but I never really had great stories to string them together.

I wish I could know everything ever, like that would be my wish - that's what I hope heaven is, that they tell you who shot JFK and all that stuff.

Talking is always positive. That's why I talk too much.

It's kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody's looking at me.

I think you have to try and fail, because failure gets you closer to what you're good at.

I don't like comedy. I like funny things. I don't like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, 'Oh Jesus.'

Breaking records is not something you expect to be doing. That's like a sports thing, it's not usually a comedy and writing thing.

When I was first divorced, I started dating younger women, and it was really exciting. But after a while I was like, 'This is just dumb.'

I have a crazy amount of different jobs, so the way I manage that is to not do more than one at a time. It's like old computers that had small memory chips, they would do something called swapping, where they would fill the memory with one task, do it and get it out.