Funny Quotes

It's funny - almost every comedian that I started out with moved to L.A., except for my two friends Hannibal Buress and Amy Schumer. And my two friends that are doing the best in comedy, the most successful friends I have, are Hannibal Buress and Amy Schumer.

Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.

I think God has a sense of humor, and the way my lessons come from God is very funny. I have to laugh at myself even if it's a tough lesson.

The funny thing about having all this so-called success is that behind it is a certain horrible emptiness.

It's a funny business. I kind of compare it to baseball. I'm always looking for a home run.

I have never pretended to be any kind of super-religious kind of man, but I feel very strongly that you can be funny without being dirty.

The older I got, the more willing I was to go into the Southern vernacular, because some of it's funny.

My chin's too big. And my nose - my nose is funny.

I've always found it easier to be funny than to be serious.

I wanted to be clever, but being funny came first. That's how you know someone is clever. They don't come out and tell you pi to 13 places - they tell you a joke.

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' but 'That's funny...'

If it bends, it's funny; if it breaks, it's not funny.

The Democratic party, respective to health care, is like a person who was sent into the store to purchase a gallon of milk and some butter for the evening's meal and instead walked out with a 'Gladiator' DVD, a can of Easy Cheese, and some Homer Simpson house slippers because how funny are they?

I think I knew I was funny in Elementary School. I think most funny people realize it when they're young. It tends to come out of stress or trauma - something that makes you want to be funny.

I like reading Ball Tongue lyrics and all that stuff. And they published a book, and I wouldn't give my lyrics, and it's all wrong in the book, and I giggle. It's funny.

It's funny; it's a real balancing act. In TV, everybody's talking about authenticity. In order to make 'Dirty Jobs' authentic, I really can't be overly informed. The minute I am, I become a host... It's a very tricky business paying a tribute to work, because TV is very bad at it.

It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.

I haven't watched 'Mad TV' a lot, but I have seen some stuff on there that is truly funny. You have to have some sort of attitude toward the subject, and they seem to have it. It depends on how much blood you want to draw.

When you reminisce, you don't say, 'Remember that time you got sued by so-and-so?' No, you say, 'Remember when we played here and it was unbelievable, and we went out for that incredible meal and that funny thing happened?' Those are the important moments.

Rock music is a funny thing: You can actually take it too far sometimes, and then it's not rock music anymore - it's something else, but it's not rock.