Teri zulfon se chanti aati bulb ki roshni ko dekh aaisa laga ... jaise kisi jharoke se chaand jhaank raha ho

Looking at the filtered light of the bulb coming from your hair it feels as if ... the moon is peeping from some window

Har ladki ki life mein ek umar aati hai jab usse realise hota hai ki ab uski life ... ek driver, ek bodyguard, ek naukar aur ek ATM ke bina nahi chal sakti ... aur ab ladki itna sab kuch toh afford kar sakti nahi na ... toh ladkiyan dhoondti hai boyfriend

In every girl's life there comes a moment when she realises that now her life ... will not work without a driver, a bodyguard, a servant and an ATM machine ... and since every girl can't afford all of this ... that's why girls look for a boyfriend

Bribe is an institution started by women ... kyun ki inke pass joh dene ko rishvat hai woh kabhi khatam nahi hone waali ... aur hum saale rishvatkhor apni maraaye jaa rahe hai ... isse toh acha hai saala apne haath se hi shaadi karlo

Bribe is an institution started by women ... because what they have to offer as a bribe is never ending ... and we dumb people who accept their bribe are getting screwed ... better than that would be to marry our hands

Har ladki ki life mein ek umar aati hai jab usse realise hota hai ki ab uski life ... ek driver, ek bodyguard, ek naukar aur ek ATM ke bina nahi chal sakti ... aur ab ladki itna sab kuch toh afford kar sakti nahi na ... toh ladkiyan dhoondti hai boyfriend

In every girl's life there comes a moment when she realises that now her life ... will not work without a driver, a bodyguard, a servant and an ATM machine ... and since every girl can't afford all of this ... that's why girls look for a boyfriend

Problem yeh hai ki main chahta hoon meri life mein koi problem hi na ho ... lekin agar meri life mein koi problem na ho na ... toh yeh uski life ki sabse badi problem hai

The problem is that I want there to be no problems in my life ... but if there are no problems in my life ... then that's the biggest problem of her life

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but koi yeh nahi batata ki behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but no one tells you that behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Abhe tu Titanic waali ko dekh le ... chal maana ki lakdi pe ek aadmi ke fit hone ki jagah thi ... toh pandra-pandra minute ki baari nahi le sakte the

Take the girl who was in the movie Titanic ... I agree that there was space for only one person on the plank ... but they could have taken turns 15 minutes at a time

Shaadi ke pehle woh nagin been kyun bajhta hai ... kyun ki na band waala bhi tumhe chetavani de raha hota hai kaun aa raha hai tumhari zindagi mein ... inka signature tune hai woh

Why do they play the snake's tune before you get married ... because even the person playing the band is warning you, as to who is coming in your life ... it's their signature tune

Biwi se sex maang le toh hum bikhari ... biwi ko sex na de toh hum atyachari ... aur kisi tarah jugaad lagake usse sex hasil karle na toh balatkari bhi hum hai

If we ask for sex from our wife then we're beggars ... if we don't give her sex then we're cruel ... and if we somehow hack our way into attaining sex from her then we're rapist as well

Ladke ne ladki ko do din hug nahi kiya toh problem ... hug kiya toh cheap ho rahe ho, itna bhi achcha nahi lagta

If a guy didn't hug the girl for two days then that's a problem ... and if he hugged then she says that you're being cheap, it doesn't look good

Do hafte dimaag chatengi table lena hai, table lena hai ... paanch ghante mall mein bitaake ek sadi si chappal uthake le aayengi ... aur phir agle do hafte dimaag chatengi table lena hai, table lena hai

For two weeks they will fry your brain that we need to buy a table, we need to buy a table ... and after spending five hours in the mall they will bring back an ugly pair of slippers ... and again for the next two weeks they will fry your brain that we need to buy a table, we need to buy a table

Har ladki ka siyapa hai ki I love surprises ... jab ki asal baat yeh hai ki women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised

Every woman claims that they love surprises ... but the reality is that women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X

Shaadi mein sabse important cheez kya hoti hai ... maang bharna ... aur aadmiyon ka toh kaam hi hai aurat ki har maang bharna

What's the most important thing in a marriage ... to fill vermilion in a women's hair parting ... and it's the duty of men to fulfill every desire of women

Ab pata chala yeh aadmiyon ko itne heart attack kyun aate hai aur yeh gay bandhe itne successful kyun hote hai ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness na

Now I came to know why so many men get heart attacks and why these gay people are so successful ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness

Shaadi shuda aadmi hamesha office ke liye late kyun ho rahe hote hai ... kyun ki joh time pe uthte hai woh baat karne mein late ho jaate hai ... aur joh samajhdar hai woh uthte hi late hai ... ki saala utho, tayaar ho aur bhaago

Why do married men are always running late for office ... because those who get up on time become late by talking ... and those who are smart get up late itself ... so that you get up, get ready and run

Saali shopping khatam nahi hoti inki ... pehle cushions aaye, phir curtains aaye ... phir cushions curtains se match nahi kiye toh aur cushions aaye ... saale mug itne hai mere yahan ki unhe bechne jaon toh mahine ka kharcha nikal aaye

Bloody their shopping never ends ... first the cushions came, then the curtains came ... then the cushions did not match the curtains so more cushions came ... bloody I have so many mugs at my place that if I go to sell them then it will cover a full month's expenses

Abhe tu Titanic waali ko dekh le ... chal maana ki lakdi pe ek aadmi ke fit hone ki jagah thi ... toh pandra-pandra minute ki baari nahi le sakte the

Take the girl who was in the movie Titanic ... I agree that there was space for only one person on the plank ... but they could have taken turns 15 minutes at a time

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but koi yeh nahi batata ki behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but no one tells you that behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Shaadi shuda aadmi hamesha office ke liye late kyun ho rahe hote hai ... kyun ki joh time pe uthte hai woh baat karne mein late ho jaate hai ... aur joh samajhdar hai woh uthte hi late hai ... ki saala utho, tayaar ho aur bhaago

Why do married men are always running late for office ... because those who get up on time become late by talking ... and those who are smart get up late itself ... so that you get up, get ready and run

Ladke ne ladki ko do din hug nahi kiya toh problem ... hug kiya toh cheap ho rahe ho, itna bhi achcha nahi lagta

If a guy didn't hug the girl for two days then that's a problem ... and if he hugged then she says that you're being cheap, it doesn't look good

Aaisa kabhi nahi hoga ki tum do lakh kama rahe ho ... aur woh maa baap ke pressure mein pachaas hazar waale se shaadi karle

This will never happen where you're making 200,000 ... and under pressure from her parents she marries someone who makes only 50,000

Raat kitni hi bhayanak kyun na ho ... subah zaroor hoti hai

No matter how dangerous the night is ... the morning definitely comes

Is duniya ke har chu*iye ko lagta hai ki uski wali alag hai ... aur tere mooh se yeh alag hai sunke mujhe yakeen ho gaya hai ki "L" lagne wale hai

Every crazy lover thinks that his woman is different ... and after listening to this different from your mouth, I'm confident that you're going to get screwed

Woh tumhare maa baap ke baare mein kuch bhi bol le ... koi tension nahi ... tum unke maa baap ke baare mein zara si ek line bol do ... toh 3rd aur 4th world war dono ek saath ho jayenge

She can say anything against your parents ... there is no issue ... but if you say even one line against her parents ... then the 3rd and 4th world war, both will start together

Koi bhi baat tum inhe samjhao ... majaal hai joh samajh aa jaaye ... wohi baat inka ek best friend samjha de toh ek minute mein samajh aa jaati hai

Try to make them understand anything ... they won't understand at all ... and if their best friend explains them the same thing then they understand within one minute

Jab tum bata sakti ho ki main kya pehnu toh mera batana achanak se ... yeh equality, liberty, individuality, freedom, sovereignty ka issue kaise ban jaata hai

If you can tell me what to wear then why is it that when I tell you the same ... it becomes an issue of equality, liberty, individuality, freedom and sovereignty

Shaadi mein sabse important cheez kya hoti hai ... maang bharna ... aur aadmiyon ka toh kaam hi hai aurat ki har maang bharna

What's the most important thing in a marriage ... to fill vermilion in a women's hair parting ... and it's the duty of men to fulfill every desire of women

Woh aaj humse mile anjaano ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah ... har nigaah mein aur door chale jaate hai ... humse nazar churate hai baimaanon ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah

She met me today like a stranger ... I was waiting for her like crazy ... in every sight she kept going farther away ... she was avoiding me with dishonesty ... I was waiting for her like crazy

Woh tumhare maa baap ke baare mein kuch bhi bol le ... koi tension nahi ... tum unke maa baap ke baare mein zara si ek line bol do ... toh 3rd aur 4th world war dono ek saath ho jayenge

She can say anything against your parents ... there is no issue ... but if you say even one line against her parents ... then the 3rd and 4th world war, both will start together

Har ladki ka siyapa hai ki I love surprises ... jab ki asal baat yeh hai ki women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised

Every woman claims that they love surprises ... but the reality is that women hate surprises ... they just love the opportunity to pretend to be surprised

Love at first sight thoda faltu type concept hi lagta hai ... but tumse ho sakta hai

Love at first sight feels like an useless concept ... but it can happen with you

Bribe is an institution started by women ... kyun ki inke pass joh dene ko rishvat hai woh kabhi khatam nahi hone waali ... aur hum saale rishvatkhor apni maraaye jaa rahe hai ... isse toh acha hai saala apne haath se hi shaadi karlo

Bribe is an institution started by women ... because what they have to offer as a bribe is never ending ... and we dumb people who accept their bribe are getting screwed ... better than that would be to marry our hands

Do saal mein, chaubees mahino mein, 104 hafton mein, 102 hafte rulaya hai isne ... ek hafta per saal ki khushi ka average kaunsi relationship mein hota hai

Out of 2 years, out of 24 months, out of 104 weeks, she has made you cry 102 weeks ... which relationship has the happiness average of one week per year

Har aadmi ka fundamental right hai hugte hue sochna

It's the fundamental right of every man to think while he is doing potty

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but koi yeh nahi batata ki behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Behind every successful man there is a woman ... true ... but no one tells you that behind every unsuccessful man also there is a woman

Bhai pyar mein log andhe ho jaate hai ... ch*tiye nahi ho jaate

People become blind in love ... but not a jerk

Teri zulfon se chanti aati bulb ki roshni ko dekh aaisa laga ... jaise kisi jharoke se chaand jhaank raha ho

Looking at the filtered light of the bulb coming from your hair it feels as if ... the moon is peeping from some window

Raat kitni hi bhayanak kyun na ho ... subah zaroor hoti hai

No matter how dangerous the night is ... the morning definitely comes

Jab tum bata sakti ho ki main kya pehnu toh mera batana achanak se ... yeh equality, liberty, individuality, freedom, sovereignty ka issue kaise ban jaata hai

If you can tell me what to wear then why is it that when I tell you the same ... it becomes an issue of equality, liberty, individuality, freedom and sovereignty

Bribe is an institution started by women ... kyun ki inke pass joh dene ko rishvat hai woh kabhi khatam nahi hone waali ... aur hum saale rishvatkhor apni maraaye jaa rahe hai ... isse toh acha hai saala apne haath se hi shaadi karlo

Bribe is an institution started by women ... because what they have to offer as a bribe is never ending ... and we dumb people who accept their bribe are getting screwed ... better than that would be to marry our hands

Shaadi ke pehle woh nagin been kyun bajhta hai ... kyun ki na band waala bhi tumhe chetavani de raha hota hai kaun aa raha hai tumhari zindagi mein ... inka signature tune hai woh

Why do they play the snake's tune before you get married ... because even the person playing the band is warning you, as to who is coming in your life ... it's their signature tune

Shaadi ke pehle woh nagin been kyun bajhta hai ... kyun ki na band waala bhi tumhe chetavani de raha hota hai kaun aa raha hai tumhari zindagi mein ... inka signature tune hai woh

Why do they play the snake's tune before you get married ... because even the person playing the band is warning you, as to who is coming in your life ... it's their signature tune

Tum meri maa ko manipulative bolo ... koi tension nahi ... maine tumhari maa ko zara sa touchy ka bol diya ... itni touch ho jaati hai ki, by god hafton tak touch karne ko na mile

She can call my mom manipulative ... there is no issue ... but if I call her mom just touchy ... then she gets so touched that, by god I don't get to touch her for weeks

Inka sabse bada ch*tiyapa yeh hai ki inhe sex ke baad bhi baat karni hai ... meetha khane ke baad koi soup peeta hai kya?

The biggest bullshit they have is that they want to talk even after sex ... who drinks a soup after having a dessert?

Ladke ne ladki ko do din hug nahi kiya toh problem ... hug kiya toh cheap ho rahe ho, itna bhi achcha nahi lagta

If a guy didn't hug the girl for two days then that's a problem ... and if he hugged then she says that you're being cheap, it doesn't look good

Shaadi mein sabse important cheez kya hoti hai ... maang bharna ... aur aadmiyon ka toh kaam hi hai aurat ki har maang bharna

What's the most important thing in a marriage ... to fill vermilion in a women's hair parting ... and it's the duty of men to fulfill every desire of women

Inka sabse bada ch*tiyapa yeh hai ki inhe sex ke baad bhi baat karni hai ... meetha khane ke baad koi soup peeta hai kya?

The biggest bullshit they have is that they want to talk even after sex ... who drinks a soup after having a dessert?

Tum meri maa ko manipulative bolo ... koi tension nahi ... maine tumhari maa ko zara sa touchy ka bol diya ... itni touch ho jaati hai ki, by god hafton tak touch karne ko na mile

She can call my mom manipulative ... there is no issue ... but if I call her mom just touchy ... then she gets so touched that, by god I don't get to touch her for weeks

Shaadi shuda aadmi hamesha office ke liye late kyun ho rahe hote hai ... kyun ki joh time pe uthte hai woh baat karne mein late ho jaate hai ... aur joh samajhdar hai woh uthte hi late hai ... ki saala utho, tayaar ho aur bhaago

Why do married men are always running late for office ... because those who get up on time become late by talking ... and those who are smart get up late itself ... so that you get up, get ready and run

Ab pata chala yeh aadmiyon ko itne heart attack kyun aate hai aur yeh gay bandhe itne successful kyun hote hai ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness na

Now I came to know why so many men get heart attacks and why these gay people are so successful ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness

Jaati na poocho saadu ki, pooch lijiye gyaan ... mol karo talwar ka, pada rehan do myaan

Don't ask a pious man about his caste, ask him about his knowledge ... value the sword high, and let it remain in the scabbard

Ab pata chala yeh aadmiyon ko itne heart attack kyun aate hai aur yeh gay bandhe itne successful kyun hote hai ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness na

Now I came to know why so many men get heart attacks and why these gay people are so successful ... because they don't have a woman to screw their happiness

Woh tumhare maa baap ke baare mein kuch bhi bol le ... koi tension nahi ... tum unke maa baap ke baare mein zara si ek line bol do ... toh 3rd aur 4th world war dono ek saath ho jayenge

She can say anything against your parents ... there is no issue ... but if you say even one line against her parents ... then the 3rd and 4th world war, both will start together

Woh kehte hain kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi ... dil bhi toh nadan unke sivah kahin aur khota nahi ... hum mangte hai ek saans, ek dhadkan, ek nigaah ... woh kabhi aur de jaate hai ... par yeh kambakht kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi

She says sometime else, but that sometime never comes ... even my silly heart doesn't go anywhere else other than her ... I ask for one breathe, one heartbeat, one sight ... but this crazy sometime else never comes

Teri zulfon se chanti aati bulb ki roshni ko dekh aaisa laga ... jaise kisi jharoke se chaand jhaank raha ho

Looking at the filtered light of the bulb coming from your hair it feels as if ... the moon is peeping from some window

Har aadmi ka fundamental right hai hugte hue sochna

It's the fundamental right of every man to think while he is doing potty

Any discussion with a woman is an argument!

Any discussion with a woman is an argument!

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X

Honeymoon is a three letter word ... S-E-X

Tum kya leke aaye the, kya leke jaoge ... nange chale aaye the, nange hi chale jaoge

What did you get and what will you take with you ... you had come naked and you'll go naked

Biwi se sex maang le toh hum bikhari ... biwi ko sex na de toh hum atyachari ... aur kisi tarah jugaad lagake usse sex hasil karle na toh balatkari bhi hum hai

If we ask for sex from our wife then we're beggars ... if we don't give her sex then we're cruel ... and if we somehow hack our way into attaining sex from her then we're rapist as well

Inka sabse bada ch*tiyapa yeh hai ki inhe sex ke baad bhi baat karni hai ... meetha khane ke baad koi soup peeta hai kya?

The biggest bullshit they have is that they want to talk even after sex ... who drinks a soup after having a dessert?

Aaisa kabhi nahi hoga ki tum do lakh kama rahe ho ... aur woh maa baap ke pressure mein pachaas hazar waale se shaadi karle

This will never happen where you're making 200,000 ... and under pressure from her parents she marries someone who makes only 50,000

India mein guest aur pest aise hi kabhi bhi kahin pe bhi aa jaate hai

In India guest and pest can come anytime and anywhere

Woh kehte hain kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi ... dil bhi toh nadan unke sivah kahin aur khota nahi ... hum mangte hai ek saans, ek dhadkan, ek nigaah ... woh kabhi aur de jaate hai ... par yeh kambakht kabhi aur, kabhi aur hota nahi

She says sometime else, but that sometime never comes ... even my silly heart doesn't go anywhere else other than her ... I ask for one breathe, one heartbeat, one sight ... but this crazy sometime else never comes

Koi bhi baat tum inhe samjhao ... majaal hai joh samajh aa jaaye ... wohi baat inka ek best friend samjha de toh ek minute mein samajh aa jaati hai

Try to make them understand anything ... they won't understand at all ... and if their best friend explains them the same thing then they understand within one minute

Do saal mein, chaubees mahino mein, 104 hafton mein, 102 hafte rulaya hai isne ... ek hafta per saal ki khushi ka average kaunsi relationship mein hota hai

Out of 2 years, out of 24 months, out of 104 weeks, she has made you cry 102 weeks ... which relationship has the happiness average of one week per year

Woh aaj humse mile anjaano ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah ... har nigaah mein aur door chale jaate hai ... humse nazar churate hai baimaanon ki tarah ... hum yunhi raah take baithe the deewanon ki tarah

She met me today like a stranger ... I was waiting for her like crazy ... in every sight she kept going farther away ... she was avoiding me with dishonesty ... I was waiting for her like crazy

Har ladki ki life mein ek umar aati hai jab usse realise hota hai ki ab uski life ... ek driver, ek bodyguard, ek naukar aur ek ATM ke bina nahi chal sakti ... aur ab ladki itna sab kuch toh afford kar sakti nahi na ... toh ladkiyan dhoondti hai boyfriend

In every girl's life there comes a moment when she realises that now her life ... will not work without a driver, a bodyguard, a servant and an ATM machine ... and since every girl can't afford all of this ... that's why girls look for a boyfriend

No but, no why ... free free bird and blue blue sky

No but, no why ... let's fly like a free bird in the blue sky

In ladkiyon ko na koi khush nahi rakh sakta ... a happy woman is a myth!

No one can keep a girl happy ... a happy woman is a myth!

Relationship ka matlab hi hota hai an end to your own happiness

The meaning of relationship is to end your own happiness

Problem yeh hai ki main chahta hoon meri life mein koi problem hi na ho ... lekin agar meri life mein koi problem na ho na ... toh yeh uski life ki sabse badi problem hai

The problem is that I want there to be no problems in my life ... but if there are no problems in my life ... then that's the biggest problem of her life

Tum kya leke aaye the, kya leke jaoge ... nange chale aaye the, nange hi chale jaoge

What did you get and what will you take with you ... you had come naked and you'll go naked

Aana toh poori tarah aana ... ya toh aana hi mat

If you come then come wholeheartedly ... or else don't even come

In ladkiyon ko na koi khush nahi rakh sakta ... a happy woman is a myth!

No one can keep a girl happy ... a happy woman is a myth!

Aaisa kabhi nahi hoga ki tum do lakh kama rahe ho ... aur woh maa baap ke pressure mein pachaas hazar waale se shaadi karle

This will never happen where you're making 200,000 ... and under pressure from her parents she marries someone who makes only 50,000