Comedy Dialogues

Joh main hoon woh main nahi hoon ... joh main nahi hoon woh main bilkul nahi hoon ... joh main bilkul nahi hoon woh main hoon

I am not what I am ... I am certainly not what I am not ... and I am what I am certainly not

Jab tak rum mein nahi hoga dum ... kaise mitega gham

Until the rum is strong ... our sadness won't go away

Chote size ki cheez hi bade bade kaam karti hai

Big things are done by items small in size

Abhe oye sadhe huye tamatar ki phu-phundi waali chutney ... baasi kadhi ke baas marte huye besan ... zamane ke bighade huye fashion ... jaale huye aloo ki kaalak, keedhe pade huye paalak ... phitkari ki phitkar, auraton ki dhutkar ... dekh kaise khadi karta hoon main teri khaat aur kaise lagata hoon main teri vaat

Hey you chutney made from rotten tomato ... stinking gram flour from a stinky curry ... disturbed fashion of the era ... blackness of a burnt potato, spinach with germs in it ... potassium in alum, cursed by women ... look what I do to you and how I screw you

Nahalo, dholo, nikalo kitna bhi mail badan ka ... phir bhi na nikle mail badan ka, kyun ki yeh pani hai jail ka

Take a bath, wash it, no matter how much dirt you remove from your body ... but still the dirt won't come out since this water is from a jail

George Michael ka pata nahi ... but have faith in me

I don't know about George Michael ... but have faith in me

Biwi ki aankhon mein pyar aur mashooka ke haathon mein hathyar ... sirf dikhave ke liye hota hai

Love in the eyes of a wife and a weapon in the hands of a girlfriend ... are both only for the purpose of showing

Devi ka prasad mandir mein milta hai ... garage mein nahin

You'll get God's sacrament in the temple ... not in a garage

Woh mooch hi kya jisse phera na jaye ... aur woh husn hi kya jisse cheda na jaye

What good is a mustache which is not turned ... and what good is a beautiful body which is not teased

Yeh haath nahi hatauda hai hatauda ... mooh pe pada na ... daant popcorn ki tarah bahar aa jayenge

These hands are like a hammer ... if it falls on your face ... then your teeth will come out like popcorn

Aadmi chahe jitna bhi teda ho ... arthi sabki seedhi hi nikalti hai

No matter how twisted a person is ... everyones funeral goes in a straight procession

Aapke facing, dressing, cutting sab kuch dekh ke mujhe ho raha hai doubting ... issi liye keh diya auraton ko no outing

Looking at your face, dressing, cutting and everything else I'm in doubt ... hence I've asked women not to step out

Chacha Chaudhary ka dimaag computer se tezz chale hai ... par tera dimaag Chacha Chaudhary se bhi zyada tezz chale hai

The mind of Chacha Chaudhary runs faster than a computer ... but your mind runs faster than that of Chacha Chaudhary

Fans halla bhi karte hai aur hawa tight bhi

Fans cheer you and get you straightened up as well

Dimaag apan ka hai jaise kismis ... chota par meetha ... zyada chalayega toh ghis jayega

My brain is like raisins ... small but sweet ... if I use it more then it will wear away

Lagta hai tum aasman se tapki ho ... upar se neeche aakar zameen par chamki ho ... uparwaale ne kya super kaam kiya hai ... tujhe fursat mein bana diya hai

Looks like you have come from the sky ... you have shined on the ground after coming from the top ... god has done such a great work ... he has made you with a lot of time

Film tab tak flop nahi hoti jab tak uska poster nahi utar jaata

A film is not considered flop until its poster is taken down

Oh kuch chup karke bol!

Oh keep quiet and say something!

Tum itni saaf ho ki tumhe aas paas ki gandagi dikhti hi nahi hai

You are so clean that you can't see the dirtiness around you

Murghe jaisi taange inki, bandar jaisa chehra ... yeh joh mere ghar aayenge baandke sar pe sehra?

He has the legs of a chicken and the face of a monkey ... he will come to my house with a turban tied on his head?