Comedy Dialogues

Bhagwan jisse kisi kaam ke liye pehda nahi karta na ... usse seth bana deta hai

When God creates a person to do nothing ... he makes him the boss

Pyar mein aadmi cutting chai jaisa hota hai ... na pyaas bhujti hai na mann bharta hai

In love a man is like a cup of tea ... neither the thirst goes away and neither you are satisfied

Hum hum hai ... baki sab pani kam hai

I am great ... and everyone else is nothing

Joh mera paisa dooba ... toh main dugna tere pichwaade mein haath dalke nikalongi

If I lose my money ... then I will use my hand and recuperate double from your backside

Tu bola main bada main bada main bada ... sara shehar mere lafde mein pada ... main poochon tu kaika bada ... tu toh ladki dene ke liye mere peeche pada

You are saying that you're big ... but the whole city is behind my craziness ... so let me ask how are you big ... because you are behind me to give your girl

Jahan chanda hoga wahan chakori hogi ... jahan thali hogi wahan katori hogi ... aur jahan tu hoga wahan main hongi

Where there is moon there will be a bird ... where there is a plate there will be a bowl ... and where you're there, I'll be there

Sab cheez time to time honi chahiye

Everything must happen time to time

Haath kangan ko aarsi kya ... joh Urdu padhe uske liye Farsi kya

Who needs a mirror to see the beauty of an arm band ... the one who can read Urdu can comprehend Persian easily

Tu patte baant ... jiski mem uski game

You deal the cards ... one who gets the queen wins the game

Apna toh aaisa-hich hai ... lade bagair apun zero aur ladke apun hero

I'm like this only ... without fighting I'm a zero and with fighting I'm a hero

Choriyon ko jahan bhi proposal ka andesha ho ... unhe do hi jagah nazar aati hai ... courtroom aur washroom ... courtroom se shaadi ho jaati hai aur washroom se azaadi

Wherever girls sense the intention of a proposal ... they only look for two places ... courtroom and washroom ... in the courtroom they can get married and from the washroom they can run away

Tareef us khuda ki jisne hum sabko banaya hai ... zara aapko yeda banaya, humko teda banaya hai

Praise the lord who has created all of us ... he has made you slightly mad and made me crazy

Bhai yeh Dilli hai Dilli ... yahan pe jab sadako pe mehenge mehenge log kaali kaali raato mein utarte hai na ... toh achchi achchi goriyaan gayab ho leti hai

Brother this is Delhi ... here on dark nights when rich people come out on the streets ... then fair girls go missing

Bombay ki public ko nahi jaanti hai aap ... maar maarke design badal deti hai

You don't know the people of Bombay ... they'll beat you up and change your design

Common chora nahi hai yeh ... kyun ki baat common sense ki kare hai

He is not a common boy ... because he is talking common sense

Do harami ek jaisa kaise sooch lete hain?

How can two bastards think alike?

Meri biwi BMW nikli ... "Bewafaa Meri Wife"

My wife turned out to be a BMW ... "Betrayful My Wife"

Tumhe mere pyar par gussa aa raha hai ... magar mujhe tumhare gusse par pyar aa raha hai

You are getting angry on my love ... but I'm loving your anger

Iodex lagane se theek hoti hai moch, B-Tex lagane se theek hoti hai khujli ... dil lagane nikle joh pati, usse maarke current gira deti hai bijli

A sprain can be cured by applying Iodex (ointment), itching can be cured by applying B-Tex (cream) ... the husband who tries to flirt, will fall down with a current from the electricity

Jahan kaam aaye sui ... wahan talwar se kaam lete ho?

Where you need a needle ... there you are using a sword?