Comedy Dialogues

Hamari zindagi ka tambu teen bambuon pe khada hua hai ... shayari, sharaab aur aap

The tent of my life is standing on three sticks ... poems, alcohol and you

Bike ho ya ghar ... handle hamesha apne haath mein ... varna bhabhi kabhi izzat nahi karegi

Be it a bike or home ... one should always keep the handle in their hand ... or else my sister-in-law will never respect you

Janam tera is duniya mein kabhi nahi hoga ... main shaadi nahi karoonga, tu paida kaise hoga?

You will never be born in this world ... because I won't get married, so how will you be born?

Main haddi nahi hoon hadda hoon ... apne daddy ka dadda hoon ... divorce karane ka adda hoon

I'm not a bone, I'm the real deal ... I am the father of my father ... and the place for getting divorce

Aathana dalke do kaudi ki dhamki toh koi bhi de sakta

Anyone can give a cheap threat by using 50 paise (in a public phone)

Aap toh woh hai joh saare jahan ka khoon peekar bhi pyasa reh jaye ... maut toh kya yamraj ko bhi nighalkar bhooka reh jaye

You're the one who even after drinking blood of the entire world still remains thirsty ... and the one who still remains hungry even swallowing death and the god of death

Kaam bhale hi main gande karta hoon ... par saaf sutre rehne ki gandi aadat hai mujhe

No matter if I do bad things ... but I have the bad habit of being clean and fresh

Saale buzdili ki gaud mein pale geedad ki sauteli aulad

Bloody you stepson of a jackal grown in the lap of cowardness

Aaisa kabhi nahi hoga ki tum do lakh kama rahe ho ... aur woh maa baap ke pressure mein pachaas hazar waale se shaadi karle

This will never happen where you're making 200,000 ... and under pressure from her parents she marries someone who makes only 50,000

Yeh ghar hai ya veerana ... na aadmi, na uski jaat ka thikana

Is this a house or ruins ... neither there is a person, nor are there any signs of someone

Jab tak ishq na karo, sab khush rakhti hai ... the problem starts once you fall in love

Until you love them, they all keep you happy ... the problem starts once you fall in love

Kisi khoobsurat ladki ko dekh kar koi chede nahi ... toh hamari society mein badtameezi mani jaati hai

If you see a pretty girl and don't tease her ... then it is treated as bad manners in our society

Aurat na, saali jab chudail nikalti hai na ... aadmi ka gobar kar deti hai

When a woman turns out to be a bitch ... then she turns a man into cow dung

Langoor ki dumm par angoor ki bail ... khatam ho gaya is moti ka khel

There is a grapevine on the tail of a monkey ... the game of this fat lady is over

Tum hamesha aaise hi bakwaas karti ho ya aaj koi special occasion hai?

Do you always talk nonsense like this or is it some special occasion today?

Iski pehli line aafat thi ... lekin last line mein rahat thi

His first line was a disaster ... but there was peace in his last line

Insaan ko hamesha clean hi hona chahiye ... dirty toh picture bhi hai

A person must always be clean ... since even a movie can be dirty

Ladkiyan shikaar hoti hai ... yaar nahi

Girls are prey ... not friends

Kanoon ke haath aur Chedi Singh ki laat ... dono bahut lambi hai

The hands of the law and the legs of Chedi Singh ... both are very long

Aate se hoga keval ghaata ... agar khaoge band gobi toh dukaan band hogi ... agar khaoge butter toh down hoga shutter ... pyaaz se badega byaaj aur sauce se hoga sirf loss ... issi liye khao keval daal aur kamao dher sara maal

With flour there will only be loss ... if you'll eat cabbage then you're shop will close down ... if you'll eat butter then you're shutter will come down ... with onion your interest will rise and with sauce you'll only bear loss ... that's why only eat lentils and earn a lot of money